CYPRUS: Boy\’s death points to the dark side of family life

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It is argued that a society should be judged on the way it treats animals when others will counter, it is how we care for the most vulnerable among us that conveys our true character.


Surveying the evidence, Cyprus doesn’t appear to have the best reputation on both counts, found wanting when it comes to animal welfare while the safety net for those in need has huge holes in it.

Cyprus is coming around to the idea that it should provide dogs with love and attention rather than starve them, inflict unnecessary cruelty by keeping them caged up, or cutting them loose when they are no longer wanted.

On another level, as a society, we shut our eyes to those in desperate need of attention – families who live in poverty and deprivation.

Women and children who are subjected to domestic violence, psychological and physical abuse.

This is the unsavoury side of a society that doesn’t take such issues seriously enough to provide the investment in resources and expertise that is required to navigate and prevent such brutality.

Cypriots pride themselves on being family-orientated protectors of children and standard-bearers for community welfare and looking after the extended family.

We want to believe that we live in a country where the poorest among us are taken care of, that children will not go hungry while the state will protect minors against sexual abuse and violence in the home.

This is a culture that prides itself on sacrifice and hard work for the betterment and well-being of our family members, especially children plus respect for elders to ensure our parents or grandparents do not live in isolation.

Cyprus is changing. We are becoming a more fractured society where the extended family is being squeezed out for a more streamlined – and dare I say – self-obsessed model.

But underneath the mores of the individual, shifting attitudes of a me generation fed on social media narcissism and boil-in-a-bag opinions, we believe in social justice for our children.

There is also an aversion to bullies who dispense violence, fear and torment to the youngest and weakest among us.

This we cannot accept; we must not allow brutal behaviour to fester in our homes and neighbourhoods, we should be able to trust the authorities to act when children are put at risk.

Which is why public opinion is still shaken by the events that led a teenage boy to takes his own life in what appears to be an act of desperation against a background of psychological torment and physical abuse.

In some small way, we all feel ashamed that an innocent life has been lost through negligence, a child that belongs to the wider Cyprus family – someone precious that could have been saved.

Earlier this week, the cabinet sanctioned an independent inquiry into the 14-year-old’s death to ascertain whether there was neglect and incompetence among the services who were aware of the boy’s family situation.

Ombudswoman Maria Stylianou-Lottides is tasked with overseeing the probe seeking answers from the social welfare, mental health service, school psychologists and the police among others.

Everyone seemed to know that something was going on, as the family were on the radar since 2007, but nobody appeared to be brave enough to do what needed to be done.

State services – including the education service and the police – were called in to deal with specific incidents that were reported and asked to intervene.

Reportedly, state services had been monitoring the family and the boy from the age of three.

Labour Minister Zeta Emilianidou called for the wide-ranging investigation because there was evidence the authorities were aware of a problem without taking the required action.

The opposition called on the minister to stand down as she is politically responsible for some of the services involved.

This is a rather churlish approach, as the whole sorry avoidable mess smacks of a complete systems failure in a country that doesn’t take social welfare seriously enough. There is no sturdy safety cushion for psychologically battered and physically abused women and children.

That’s on us because we tolerate a system that fails the most vulnerable who need a loving, compassionate and secure environment.

Undoubtedly, the report on the case will make uncomfortable reading, while, hopefully, shedding light on a totally inadequate system that instead of saving lives is losing them.

Apparently, numerous red flags were raised about the plight of this family that was being monitored but beyond anyone’s pay grade to provide a safe solution.

Did indifference lead to this tragic outcome, or a failure to join up the dots by competing services burdened with red tape and bureaucracy and a lack of skilled staff?

Whatever the evidence, we are now looking at the dark side of family life where its members have no value, except to be exploited and controlled in a precarious existence.

Under the spotlight of outrage, the government must invest in resources and training to deploy rescue teams that can extract women and children from domestic abuse in all its guises.